In part 1 we looked at how our physical health can be a driver of energy. When we eat well, drink plenty of water, exercise daily and get plenty of sleep our energy stores will be high. Today I am going to discuss with you how our emotions can impact on our energy. Actually many people argue that most of our energy comes from emotional energy. Its more that just feeling happy but rather feeling passionate, having purpose and having a heart that is not only happy but filled with a spirit of hope.
When we feel emotionally drained it is hard to be able to focus and feel motivated to complete daily tasks. It creates habits of procrastination, whinging, sadness and general lethargy. This is a common complaint from the everyday person, actually Mira Kirshenbaum states in her book ‘The Emotional Energy Factor’ that 1 in 8 adults is in a low energy state. As a society we have become a group of people that work to live rather than following passion, love and happiness. We have seen a dramatic increase in depression rates and general un happiness over the past decade. People feel overworked, underappreciated, constantly connected and torn in all directions.
So how do we get and then protect our emotional energy?
The way we think and perceive situations can have a drastic impact on our emotional energy. I don’t want to suggest that you should always think positive or ignore unpleasant emotions but you have to find a way to move through them. When you are feeling angry or sad find a way to feel that emotion, thank it for bringing something to your attention and then learn how to let it go. Easier said than done though right! Here are some of my suggestions for working through emotions:
– Move your body! This may be in the form of weights, running, going for a walk, putting on some epic music and dancing around, yoga, Pilates, boxing, team sport or anything that gets your physical body moving. Movement is one of the best ways to increase endorphins, it also helps to clear the mind, move emotions through your body and get rid of any unwanted negative energy
– Practice gratitude everyday! Everyone has something to be grateful for, i’m not talking about the big stuff like a roof over your head and healthy kids, i’m talking about the little daily things. The warm sun in the morning, a cute dog to got to pat, a coworker buying you a coffee, a yummy snack you ate, looking smoking hot in your daily outfit of choice, your eyeliner going on perfectly, getting a good parking spot ect. If you can find at least 10 little things everyday that you are thankful for I promise you your mindset will start to change. If you make yourself write down 10 things either every morning or every night before bed you will start to look for things all day. All of a sudden you are thinking about where you see the good things rather than focusing on the negative.
– Focus on your passion and your why (more on this below)
– Talk to friends and family – don’t bottle it all up. If you have no one you feel comfortable to talk with then hire someone. Get a life coach or business coach, see a psychologist or a councilor, find a mothers group or women’s circle. Just talk to some honey because bottling it up or pretending you are fine will not help.
– Let it go! Other peoples thoughts and feelings are not yours and you have to be able to listen and then separate. If my son is angry and has a meltdown that doesn’t have to effect my emotions. But up boundaries around you to protect your energy. No one is getting through this field of mine that I have built. On that topic it is also important to remember that peoples thoughts about you are none of your business! If someone thinking poorly of you or thinks you are amazing its none of your business and shouldn’t effect how you manage your own emotional energy.
– Breathe! Breath work is amazing at helping you calm your nervous system and managing emotions. YouTube breathe work and you will fins some great videos to help you through the process.
– Essential Oils have an amazing capacity to help change our state or allow us to feel what we want to feel. I use the emotional aromatherapy range from doTERRA as well as floral oils such as rose, jasmine, neroli and magnolia. Use as a pure-fume or roll on the soles of your feet and down the spine. I lather the oils all over my body every morning to make me feel amazing both inside and out! If you want more information on how to use essential oils for emotions drop me a line.
This is a difficult topic to discuss as everyone will have a different set of boundaries depending on what they value and find important. For me I have strict boundaries in place around night time routine with my kids, I really value time in the evening with my husband so my kids at in bed, and normally asleep by 7pm. We don’t go out at night during the week, if a family member is having a birthday dinner on a Wednesday night we don’t go. If my husband and I don’t have time together then our relationship is not as strong and I can’t be the best mum, friend, sister or daughter. I also read my book every night before bed, sometimes 20 pages and sometimes 1 but I always pick it up and read. Self development is super important to me and reading helps me get to my next level so I always find the time.
So what do you value? What is non-negotiable for you? Find them, write them and then put things in place and stick to it. Is it about the food you eat, exercise time, work time, play with your kids, budget related, routine, family time, phone time ect. Your boundaries need to be communicated with the people around you. Discuss them with your partner, your kids, parent, siblings, workmates or your boss. When you are clear with others it is easier to maintain strong boundaries.
You may also have emotional boundaries including the people you allow into your life. If you have friends or family that every time you see, you leave feeling crappy then stop seeing them. You could choose to have a conversation with them about what you no longer wish to hear about or discuss if you know what is effecting your energy. I now only choose to surround myself with high vibe people, if I don’t leave feeling energised then it was not worth my time. There are obviously exceptions to this, I can still be a good friend and help people in need or be a friendly ear just not if that is every time we see each other. Choose your tribe wisely as you become like the people you hang out with.
Passion and Love
Have a purpose and a why! Know why you are doing what you are doing. Don’t go through life just going through the motions and then being angry about it. Why do you go to your current job? Do you love it? Is it a passion or something you find value in? I understand that no one is every going to love their job everyday but as a whole you have to like what you do or you will spend a lot of time feeling low on energy. Do you only do it for the money or because the hours are good? You either need to find things about your job that you appreciate and like and focus on those or change! I am not joking here, I get a lot of people are reading this thinking “it’s not that easy, I can’t, I don’t have any other skills, I need the money, I have to support my kids, no one will hire me, there are no other jobs” – I CALL BULLSHIT ON IT ALL!!! Make it work! Do the extra study, start the hide hustle that will turn into a full time income, go to companies and sell yourself and your skills, do the work! The more you sit in misery and in the pity party about how your life is crap the more it will become crap. We get back from the universe what we put out! So go out and show the universe what you’ve got!
When you feel good you have more energy, so do the things that make you feel good and protect your energetic boundaries.